Keep Things in Perspective! (And pray every day for the world to do the same)

This Christmas Season I decided to be quiet. To stop talking, stop writing, stop having an opinion and listen, just listen. As you can see from the last entry to this blog it has been a very quiet time for the Office of Young Adult Ministry, and a very quiet time for me. As I headed into the busy season of Advent and Christmas, I found myself more and more quiet, watching the hustle and bustle of people around me, the acquisition of more and more stuff that people don’t really need; the adoption of this Christian holiday by people who are not very (if at all) Christian the other days of the year (even my Jewish friends were busy decorating their Christmas tree and buying presents), the television shows, commercials and store music that really made you feel like an alien if you were not so ready to buy into the whole thing.  I found myself wondering what I could get my son that would make his eyes twinkle and shriek with excitement on Christmas – because to tell you the truth, I needed that more than anything because he is growing up and there is no little boy in my house any longer.  Despite him telling me that he didn’t need anything I wanted to get him something, and the world around me told me that I did too.  On Christmas Eve I found myself pretty depressed that as a single mother, I really couldn’t justify threatening the mortgage payment, or heating fuel, or – oh yea, Christmas Eve my furnace decided to get sick, so an emergency visit of a repairman on Christmas Day also didn’t help – and all along my son told me that he didn’t need anything. But as parents we all know that the abundance of Christmas isn’t really about what our kids need, or what they want, but about us, and how we have bought into what the world tells us we are suppose to be as parents and perhaps, it is a way for us to make up all those times throughout the year when we didn’t do it perfectly, because somehow we were taught that we are suppose to do it perfectly every time!  As I went to sleep that night, hoping we wouldn’t get too much snow this winter because my porch roof doesn’t look like it can take the pressure, and worried about the furnace, wondering if I was enough for anything or anyone, and the thoughts kept whirling in my head, -- I prayed for Peace. My thoughts went to that small family in the manger, “no crib for his bed”, and imagined what they would be thinking. Would they concentrate on the conditions of the manger or just be grateful to have shelter?  I wondered of all mother’s and father’s who were lonely this Christmas, that felt that they would let their kids down because they couldn’t get them the latest i-product or whatever it is they had been asking for. I thought of all the mother’s and father’s who did buy things that they really couldn’t afford and were lying awake at night wondering how to get pass this Christmas.  Like the Shepherds in the fields, sometimes life is dark and lonely, even on Christmas night.  We have to see the Light, that only God can send us, and follow it, no matter how difficult the journey -- that leads us to Jesus, quietly sleeping in His mother’s arms, surrounded by Love, waiting for us to be present.  “What do I have to give the King?” asked one of the Shepherds, and the other replied, “We can give him our faith.” (There is nothing like a Christmas pageant when you hear these words spoken by children and you can really get it!)  I fell asleep with the thoughts of Jesus and the prayer of so many lonely souls that night.

But I awoke wanting to be silent.  No inspiration to write about anything.

I spent much time during the holiday, reading and watching movies, spending time with Noah and playing some board games. The time went by way too quickly as I am sure you can agree.

Then it came to me, as I sat in Sunday Mass this past weekend – one line that changed my spirit – “Mary kept these things, reflecting on them in her heart.”  My quiet Christmas made sense, it is ok, to take it all in and quietly reflect on them, that there is time to be quiet and time to speak, and both are ok.  And I was able to be so grateful for all that I saw this holiday season. I was able to dig up the manual for the furnace and begin to understand how they work, and what all the buttons are for; and for a moment, I stopped, all the anxiety of what I think the world should be like, and as Noah and I were looking at the planets through his telescope on a very cold, clear night (the night sky has been full of entertainment the last few weeks!), I thought of those Shepherds and Wise men, who had been called to leave the familiar and search for the origin of a star, and there they would find Love.

I believe that nothing happens by coincidence; this past summer, as Noah was starting to become attracted to stars and planets, black holes and galaxies, we attended Creation Fest, in which Louis Giglio spoke of God’s Magical Symphony – the sounds of God’s creation, even stars, praising the Creator. It was an awesome presentation. I ran into Sam’s a couple days before Christmas, and as I was quickly passing the book section, heading toward the frozen foods, something caught my eye, it was a small paperback book, by Louie Giglio entitled “Indescribable” and I thought, “Hey this is the guy this summer!” And I got it to give to Noah for Christmas, because his love of the night sky was increased by the presentation of this guy.  Noah was very excited, and I got to see that twinkle! (And it wasn’t even an i-product!) and within a couple of days Noah had finished the book, and when I asked him how the book was, he replied, “Indescribable Mom!” But he wanted to share one thing he learned about with me and it not only, brought things into prospective, it connected all the dots from my Christmas experience-- it is a video done by Carl Sagan, describing this “Pale Blue Dot” we live on and I want to share it with you. Perhaps it will help all of us keep things in perspective in 2012 and really understand that God is BIG and we are small, and when we get caught up in something that feels life or death, and it really isn’t, remember our size in the big scheme of things, and why not do the right thing whatever the consequences and stop living in fear, because our time is less than a fraction of a second, and people are suffering because of our own inflated sense of self importance as the collective “us” refuse to see the big, big, big picture God sees.  To keep things in perspective is my prayer for myself, for you and for all the world in 2012.